Farewell 2008

As another year drifts to a close it is time to pause and reflect, to look backwards over the past twelve months and then turn and pass through the door to 2009. 2008 did not disappoint. I entered the year full of hope and optimism and by and large, this was the way of my year.

2008 was the year of commitment: M's brother married his beautiful wife in February and then in June M proposed to me. Our announcement was swiftly followed by that of two sets of university friends and one set of school friends and so 2009 seems set to be the year of the wedding (although I suspect that 2010 and beyond will be no different).

2009 will be a year of change for me personally as well as globally. First of all, it will be the first year since university when I have not smoked a cigarette. M and I managed to kick our penchant for a social cigarette with a drink or two six weeks ago. It will also be the year that, all being well, I qualify and become Mrs B. There will be some probable blog re-branding too, as Little Miss Rachel does not fit the life and times of a newly wed-to-be.

Globally there are great expectations from Mr Obama and from Mr Brown too, as he leads us through this period of recession. Personally speaking the drop in base rate and housing prices has brought nothing but cheers and I hope that we can all learn something about value and making do. A downwards looking economy coupled with being older and much more aware means that the world feels far far less certain than ever before.

In my mind's eye I see myself on the eve of 2000 with a boy I thought I loved (who knew at 17 that being in love and simply liking being loved could be mistaken for one and the same thing) preparing to take A-levels and leave home and start a new life at university and beyond, in a new century, yet somehow this NYE seems even more uncertain than that.

And so, as 2008 passes into 2009, M and I shall, for the first time since I have known him, spend the evening together, at home, quietly (with some decent champagne) rather than at a huge party and welcome in the new year in the way we hope to spend much more of the coming year. While for us there is much celebration to come in 2009 my thoughts are with others who do not or cannot share this.

And so, as 2008 passes into 2009, I shall pause a moment to remember Roderick and I shall think of my darling cousin and hope that she is able to find some comfort in the ending of her year and the start of a new one.

And so, dear readers, I know not what 2009 will bring to you but I hope that you have a peaceful and fitting end to 2008 and start to 2009 and I will see you next year.


(2006 and 2007 if you are interested)

Farewell 2007

I know, I am a day early. But tomorrow will be taken up with packing and travelling back to London and preparing for our party. S0 today it is.

The New Year. A chance to look backwards, a chance to look forwards. January, Janus, the keeper of doors and gates, one face looking forwards and the other looking backwards. The symbol of change, from one state to another. January, the first month of the calendar year and the first month of my year. I was born in the middle of a snow storm in the morning of the fifth day of January 1982. My Daddy was the only Daddy to visit his baby; walking boots, a bicycle and a duvet jacket being far more effective than a car at running through deep snow. For me, the New Year and my own new year have always been a time to reflect and plan and this year is no different.

This Christmas was my 26th Christmas. It was the first Christmas M and I have spent together at my parents house; it was the first Christmas since I was at school that both maternal and paternal Grandparents have celebrated with us. It was the first Christmas spent at my own house where both sisters were not present. We split our week off, M and I. 3 days at my parents and then 3 days at his. Life is less busy at his parents. Whilst M played golf yesterday his mother took me shopping and out for lunch. 2007 has been the first year where I have identified my budget and my gaps in my wardrobe and only bought what I needed (with a couple of bargain-ous exceptions which it would have been churlish to resist).

So, 2007 was my quarter century. I started the year entering the new age box 25-34 and felt rather adrift. It was the first time I felt older on my birthday, that the years were drifting away. That I hadn't really achieved what I thought I might have done by 25. And then, suddenly, things started happening. M and I moved to a new house where we have really been able to set up our home together, rather than a mutually convenient roosting place. Where we have enjoyed spending time together and where we have enjoyed entertaining our friends. We went on a trip of a lifetime to Morocco to celebrate our 5th anniversary and I had an interview for a Training Contract before we went and came home to a job offer: I am now a much longed for trainee solicitor and qualify in year and four months. 2007 has also been the year that my writing took off - articles published in several on-line magazines as well as the traditional format North Africa Times - and perhaps my happiest year since I was 17 in 1999. I wonder if it is coincidence that both summers involved prolonged sailing adventures?

The Prime Minister of my formative years (15-25) stood down in 2007 and in his place is his successor, Mr Brown. He will take the politics of my late twenties forward, although how far remains to be seen. The years where I have become interested, informed, with an opinion to air and a willingness to discuss. 2007 has also been a global focussed year for me personally as well, with one sister travelling and the other sister studying in the USA. 2008 looks to be more so, with the travelling sister off again once more, this time to Australia for a year or more.

2008 will be here in 32 hours, give or take 20 minutes. 2007 has been a good year, for me at least, although I am not sad that it is drawing to a close, that the finale is underway and the curtain shall at last soon fall. A life long pessimist, I actually feel rather optimistic about 2008. I know that there will be disappointments (both sisters out of the country and so on) but I feel older, more mature, more in control. I have started to grow into the 25-34 age group and I think am more ready to face the things which it will contain. I am exicited about returning to London, to our friends, even to work. I think I am looking forward to 2008.

Clear out

On Sunday afternoon I went for a walk on Hampstead Heath. The sun was clear and still warm and the light was beautifully autumnal. Some of the trees had begun to lose their leaves and as I walked I scuffed them out of the way. Looking at my feet I did not see my own 25 year old feet in their Ugg boots, rather my 9 year old feet in their blue start-rite T-barred school shoes, scuffing through the leaves on the way to school.

My 25 year old self still has much in common with that 9 year old school girl. I am still always late, bad tempered when hungry and a terrible horder of possessions. That 9 year old lived in a small bedroom where her father had built her a ‘ships bunk’ in the wall with cupboards underneath and a ladder to reach the bunk. This gap quickly became full of possessions and then the room followed suit.

That 9 year old did eventually learn to keep things relatively tidy but she never perfected the art of de-cluttering. Take for example, the art of shoe purchasing. Most people would buy the shoes, take them out of the box and throw away or recycle the box and the carrier bag. Not me. I keep shoes in their boxes and if the bag is plastic it joins its sisters and brothers in the kitchen, if it is paper it is folded up and allowed to join the vast collection of other paper bags.

When I arrived home on Sunday afternoon having watched the Grand Prix, I realised that I could no longer function in the state I was in. We moved into the house in May yet many possessions were still in their boxes, I had not unpacked any of our pictures, ornaments, photographs or even some of our clothes. I had unpacked as I needed things rather than trying to create a new home.

I unpacked the winter clothes from their suitcase and then packed up all my summer ones. As I sorted through the clothes, despite having sorted them when I moved, I made more piles – clothes which I actually wear, clothes which I know M hates, clothes for washing, clothes that were clean and so on and filled two bags to be taken to the charity shop. I cleaned and dried all my summer shoes and packed them back into their boxes and managed to throw away a large number of boxes and bags. When I put the recycling out last night it appeared that not only had we had a massive party but that we had been on an enormous shopping trip.